Right from the start, I’ve been drawn to working with clients on recognising and connecting with who they truly are. It always felt like this was the root of their concerns. Yet, as I’ve continued my explorations, I’ve discovered that not knowing who they are is only part of the issue overall. Another significant aspect is the act of masking ourselves in an effort to fit in and feel safe in our environment.
For most people, masking is a learnt behaviour created in childhood. As adults, we measure the risk of sharing our authentic selves with others, and if the risk is too high we mask the aspects we feel won’t be accepted, or worse, will be rejected. We predict how others will respond and then choose the approach that is likely to minimise the negative impact on ourselves.
It all makes logical sense, but I feel this has led to a world where people struggle to make real connections. A place where maintaining the mask is more important than living our lives, and those who dare to share themselves are attacked as their behaviour makes others feel uncomfortable. This appears to be a whole lot of people hurting beneath the masks they individually wear. I’m feeling a deep connection to healing all this pain, and at present that’s one person at a time. Until I find another way to reach more people with an authentic connection.